If Your Dog Could Text...

Let's say your beloved mutt managed to grow some thumbs and was able to use a cellphone—it would probably be a very bad thing because you'd end up getting texts like this ALL THE FRIKKIN TIME.

The key to looking classy & sexy in Russia seems to be to look like an oompa loompa and live in a town near chernobyl. Barbie cloning gone wrong. Nuclear devastation is the only answer for most of them!

Two of the best things in life. Beautiful ladyfolk and delicious pig meat. Obviously a combination of the two would reach dangerous levels of awesome. Weather it's a lady wearing bacon sushi or a rasher tattoo, it's all golden.

Remember some of your favorite characters from childhood? Well, prepare for them to be turned into twisted demons and freaks in this series that will certainly rape your childhood of any decent remaining memories.

Are you worried that you're a little bit on the untidy side? Really? Believe me, you're nthing compared to these people. If untidy was akin to a punch in the arm then these offenders would be standing trail for mass murder.

What do you get if you cross video games and table top gaming? A kickass army from a demonic dimension, complete with Former Humans, Cacodemons, Lost Souls, Revenants and even a fat greasy Mancubus. Sterling work.

It's time for the Monday experience to hit you once again, except, it's Tuesday, because yesterday you were out celebrating the life of Jeebus & today you are nursing a killer hangover. I'd suggest a large dose of this.

Not having 20:20 vision might be a disadvantage in some ways but it's won't stop you from being blazing hawt, as any of these optically impaired turbo babes will demonstrate.

It was a great party at the weekend (shame you don't remember it), wine, women & song flowed like it'd never end. Now there is the small problem about making it home, which sudddenly seems a looong way away, if you can still remember where it is?

These photos might just be a one-off & she could have had them taken for a laugh - However, by whatever fate or design, they found their way to the internet & for that reason alone i know there IS a god !

More exciting than watching your first child being born whilst walking on the moon on an IV drip of cocaine, or winning the superbowl & then discovering you have superpowers. Too bad you won't remember it in the morning.