If Your Dog Could Text...

Let's say your beloved mutt managed to grow some thumbs and was able to use a cellphone—it would probably be a very bad thing because you'd end up getting texts like this ALL THE FRIKKIN TIME.

It's an important event in any young persons life that they try their hardest to get into college and do their best with their parents hard-earned cash. Not to study, but to have fun. And of course drink LOTS of beer. Lots.

Forget everything you have ever learned about bespecled ladies, it's all lies. These four eyed females are some of the most freakiest, wildest women around. Don’t you want to know what is really behind those thick-rimmed spectacles?

Not sure whether these would sell too well or even if they'd past safety regulations, but they're pretty damn cool. Created to the precise blueprints of tiny hands and simple minds, each one is unique.

Proof that under all that flubber lies a ripped body just waiting to be shown off. I just knew i had muscles. Kinda. I'm guessing that quite a lot of personal work was required to make some of these amazing body alterations posible.

Come on, have a little think about it, you don't really like those girls in films & magazines who have been airbrushed & retouched SO much that they probably don't exist! What you REALLY want is a girl-next-door type who really does live next door!

How VERY true! Usually this warning accompanies imagery so disturbing it seers itself into your retina for all time but not in this gallery. Fear not, these are images that will just make you look at common things a bit differently.

As the old saying goes, "you don't look at the mantel when you're poking the fire" - I guess you could avoid the horror with a brown paper bag, or better yet, a Halloween mask :(

Ahhh, body shots, nature's way of letting us all taste the sweet nectar of alcohol the way it was intended to be drunk. No need for glasses, just use the nearest cute chick and offer to lick up any mess from her afterwards!

'Cute Emo', isn't that some kind of surreal oxymoron, or is it? Ladies & gentlemen, i present a gaggle of Emo chicks that have to be scene to be believed, just don't ask them how ther are doing. EVER!

These women ain't just "fit" they are "PWOPER FIT": you could play their stomachs like fleshy glockenspiels. They probably get up stoopid early, but SH*T, THEY HOT!