Disney Back Tattoo

This chick must REALLY like her Disney movies. If this is an actual tattoo and not merely painted on she's got some impressive pain threshold too. If she makes a good sammich too, I'd hit it.

If I had a penny for every time some jackass took my photograph and managed to ruin the picture by focusing on what was going on behind me, I'd have a LOT of pennies.

It's time to act like a man and be responsible, and also sample some of the fringe benefits of practicing some 'safe sex' at the same time - YEEHAH!

Breaking up in a relationship can be very stressful, sometimes one of the partners can't let go. Cue one of the less outrageous storylines from Jerry Springer's little shop of horrors. Classic TV.

When your food starts to communicate with you as you dine with your girlfriend, you know you've found the girl to stick with for a while. Either that or you are on some serious medication.

When a shark has gotten this close, warning you buddy is kinda pointless, you should just try and get a verbal agreement that you can have all his stuff.

It's difficult being a man, nearly dying every time you get flu, deciding where to pee when you're caught short and you're out and about, and trying to read your girlfriend's mood from her facial expressions.

To nom, or not to nom: that is the question: Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous hunger, or to take arms against a sea of nomables, and by opposing eat them?

Seems a bit steep of a price to me. I'll sell you my ass candy for only 99 cents a pound!

When it comes to badly shooping yourself onto the head of a stranger so it looks like you're totally dating a totally hot babe, make sure she's not a Z list celebrity. Make sure she's A list. Aim high.

This brings new meaning to the phrase 'drunk as a dog.' - LOL